While studying drama in graduate school at Berkeley, the
confrontation that set off a real change in my thinking was the draft.
I not only didn't believe in war, I didn't even believe in the military,
because I could not give up my freedom to an outside organization or person.
I knew that I could be free in prison but not in the military.
I didn't have a religious background,
so I hesitated before applying for Conscientious Objector.
I knew in my own mind that I was conscientiously opposed to war;
the only doubt was whether I would be considered as such by the authorities.
The first question on the C-O form was, "Do you believe in a Supreme Being?"
I realized there must be a Supreme Being.
When it was put that abstractly, I could go along with it.
So I checked yes.
Then I came to the second question,
"Define the nature of the Supreme Being you believe in."
I decided to do some research, and I am still investigating that subject.
I read the Gospels, the Portable World Bible, philosophy, psychology, etc.
I could agree with the Hindu ideas of the Self in all things—
that when the Self leaves a tree, then it dies,
and if it doesn't leave it, it doesn't die—the essence of life.
When I was young, I had marveled at the miracle of life in plants,
the miracle of animals, and the miracle of man.
I also like the Buddha's teaching that
"Hatred does not cease by hatred, but by love."
In my imagination I visualized the complete transformation of
contemporary society by a true religion of love,
led by one who merely called people to join him in this perfect life.
In May 1968 while on LSD I saw 200l A Space Odyssey
and intuitively understood the symbolism.
That night I read the little book called the Tao Teh Ching by Lao-tzu,
which contains the mystical philosophy.
I understood ideas as perfectly natural that I had not been exposed to in this lifetime.
I turned in my application for Conscientious Objector, writing,
"I believe in Tao, and I seek Teh" and giving them a copy of the book.
I indicated that violence was contrary to my nature.
Finally when I did appear before the draft board,
I explained in my own words that since the unity exists,
and everything is one consciousness,
I no more would want to hurt my brothers and sisters than
I would take my right hand and try to destroy my left hand.
Apparently I was convincing, and was given the status of being
conscientiously opposed to war in any form.
I went to the University of California at Santa Barbara
to enroll in the Religious Studies program.
I also studied astrology and gave Tarot readings.
I observed people and how they fit with their signs,
and the present time and how it fit with the planets.
I examined myself most closely and the cosmic plan when I was born.
It helped me to integrate my own personality and to understand
my interest in drama and mystical philosophies.
I read the Aquarian Gospel, and understood the cosmic change of the ages—
how the Piscean teachings were brought forward by Jesus
and how now we are entering the Aquarian Age.
In a spiritual reading Gladys Jones told me I had refined out
harsh qualities through many incarnations.
Reincarnation was so natural and logical that I accepted it.
When I mentioned the Tarot, she said that I was more mystical
than occult and that I could develop direct communication with God.
When I asked her if this would be my last lifetime,
she seemed taken aback by the question and said she could not answer that.
I encountered many spiritual groups but still hadn't met anyone
who could show me how to break free of the wheel of reincarnation.
Continuing my investigation of Supreme Being, I developed a working,
living philosophy that I could use.
Love is paramount as being the unity of all; consciousness learns,
understands, and knows; while creativity perceives the beautiful,
contemplates the true, and acts for the good.
In 1969 a man asked me to give Bishop James A. Pike
an astrology reading as his gift for Jim.
A few weeks later he unexpectedly died in Israel.
I also read his wife Diane's horoscope and others,
beginning to practice astrology professionally.
By January 1970 I was awakening to the reality of the Christ,
the Buddha, the prophet Mohammed, or whatever terminology may be used—
that that is in me. I did my best to carry that consciousness with me wherever I went.
When I attended a seminar and experienced the consciousness of John-Roger,
I went up to him afterward prayerfully in the sense of worshipping the God
within him that is within everyone.
I knew his Divine Nature was awakened.
I said I was very impressed by where he is and asked him
which of my chakras were open.
He told me about chakras that I didn't even know about.
When I said that most people aren't aware of those,
he said that most people don't see.
I experienced the Mystical Traveler Consciousness working with me.
Once before going to a pot-luck dinner where
there were many people involved in MSIA, I asked to grow as fast as I could,
asking John-Roger inwardly to really lay it on me, and he did!
I must have had an illusion per minute snapped away or shown to me.
The Holy Spirit was everywhere,
and the Light was bouncing these reflections back to me.
I kept thinking, "How do these people know exactly what to say?"
But then I knew that it was John-Roger and the Light coming through.
After that evening I decided to completely quit taking drugs
and subsequently went through quite a hell getting free of the negative effects.
I had been searching for three years to find the Spirit and the guidance I needed.
As I straightened my path I had to clean house of the repressed
and hidden fears, resentments, etc.
Through the support of MSIA and the guidance of John-Roger,
I have walked through the shadows in the perfect protection of the Light.
Now the way is becoming ever brighter and smoother,
as the spiritual heart radiates the divine love that is in all.
My gratitude can only express by using this Light for the highest good of everyone.
I see the beauty of acceptance in opening to the flow of Spirit.
By accepting that I am capable of doing something,
the Spirit is able to work through me in writing or singing a song,
acting or directing a play, writing poetry or philosophy, counseling
or teaching with the Light, healing spiritually, soul traveling, etc.
Consciously I would not have dreamed I could do works
that are already being accomplished.
The Light and the Mystical Traveler Consciousness accomplish all things
in perfect harmony; we are but the channels as we allow ourselves to be.
In this Golden Age of Living Love, the Holy Spirit is being poured forth
through humanity in the freedom and grace of the Christ Consciousness
which is transforming man's limited awareness
into the infinite potential of the Hu-man divine creator.
By opening to the Spirit that is eternally present,
we truly realize that the blessings are already here now.
Sanderson Beck